Saturday, October 16, 2010

completion.

If I even knew where to start all this, I would be so much better!!

The last three months have been so revealing for me.  To many of you, I have been unnecessarily (and some even perceived as disrespectfully) silent.  Totally not my intention.  I've just been focused.


I've had to learn a lot about me.  Acknowledging that I can have a defeated attitude when I want to.  There's a spiritual parallel here, but for time's sake (and the fact that I am EXHAUSTED), I'm going to skip that tonight.

But here's the Real Deal:  Today, this lovely sixteenth day of October, I ran a 5k.  Mind you, snails passed me, but I stayed in motion the entire time.  I ran with another lady from my church, who'd had gall bladder surgery in September no less.  In my mind, she was my fellow miner.  She was someone that I wasn't going to leave.  Running alone is not something I really love, it's something I find myself having to do and know that I need too, but still, not something I enjoy.  I knew this morning, from the get-go, without having to be told, that I needed to stay with her, and that she would stay with me.  It was so weird and awesome at the same time.

When we got to the last .10 of a mile, she broke down bawling.  (And for reasons I don't want to uncover, I did not.  SHOCKER!)

Here's what else I know: I am not a pushover.  I am not less than.  I deserve God's best for me, and regardless of what I do to screw things up at times, I know God is faithful.  He ran right alongside me this morning.  He is my comfort and present help.  His grace will sustain me, and his mercy engages me.  His love is everlasting and his promises are good!

I ran this race, and I can run a lot of others.  That doesn't mean I can quit training; it doesn't mean I'll place first or last.  It means I CAN run them.  It means I CAN finish.

and I will.

xoxo,
me.

14 comments:

Critty said...

Whoo to the Hoo!! I am so proud of you friend! You did it! I love how God teaches us things through these journeys. While you worked on running and finishing the race...He was showing you so many different other things. He is so good to us.

I am so glad in the quiet He shows us there is beauty. Being quiet is never a bad thing. Enjoy it. He has reasons for these seasons.

<3

Mrs. C said...

Great job! Way to go!

Bitsy said...

You ran the race and get the prize!! I am soooo proud of you and love you. :)

slommler said...

What a wonderful statement!! You are more than...not less than!! And that you completed the race if a real milestone! That is super!!! Congrats!!
Hugs
SueAnn

Aims said...

I know you probably don't want to hear from me, but I thought I would leave you a comment. That is a big achievement that you accomplished yesterday and you should be proud of yourself. I've had to run a few "races" myself and I am looking forward to the prize at the end. Keep racing physically and spiritually!

Faith said...

SOOO proud of you Jen! Such an inspiration to so many! Love you!

Mimi said...

I am SO very proud of you! What strength of character to decide to do this & stick with it.

I just found another one of your books that didn't make it into the batch I mailed back to you.

E-mail or text me your mailing addy again & I'll get it right out.

Hugs &love,
Mimi

Paige said...

Waaaaahhhhooooooo!!!! I am so proud of you!! What an accomplishment. I am sure that you have inspired more people that you will ever know!

Tasha said...

Great job friend! I am so proud of you! You are an inspiration!!

Regina said...

Fabulous! What an awesome achievement! And good for you for supporting someone else. = )

Kristine said...

Yay!! :) That's so amazing!! Really happy for you! Enjoy New York! :)

Kristine (again) said...

You, giving your best and not just going through the motions, have been really inspiring. I was on the cusp of ignoring my better judgement/giving into fear, but your reflection on this process and God's faithfulness have helped me with my own hard decision. Here's to taking risks, giving it your all, and trusting that no matter what, we'll be okay. Thank you, Jenn.

Gina said...

Oh gosh I'm behind! But YAY!!! for you!!! :O)
Great job.
-Gina

Mike said...

You rule the school! K & I are super proud of you.