aphiemi.

My FBC ladies and I are doing a Beth Moore Bible study on Revelations.

Good stuff. 

I know that today is what (many) are celebrating as the second day of Advent. 

So in that spirit, I thought I'd share something I gleaned from the video tonight:

"Forgiveness and Hurt cannot dwell in the same set of hands.  You must relinquish one in order to grasp the other."

I struggle with that.

This week, just a day ago, I found something that hurt me deeply.  It was something small and (probably) stupid, but I wound up crying for an hour about it.  And I had to realize that I don't allow many things to hurt me.  Things do a little, but this year, I've found myself walking away instead of dealing with the emotions of it all.  Bottling it up, putting it away, repressing the whole of it.

Quite frankly, it scares the hell out of me that I can be so cold.  So disconnected.

I don't want to be this way.

I have to decide to stop trying to hold the hurt and the forgiveness in the same hands.

And wouldn't you know that I realize how exhausting it has been trying to do so?

here's to my own aphiemi...

xoxo,
Me.