Last night was the first night in a week that I've actually slept the whole night through.
And my good night's sleep? It comes from a weekend with my mom, where I could talk openly and honestly and share some deep feelings that I haven't shared with anyone, as well as getting a chance to REALLY talk to my roommate. My weekend, albeit full of work and some tears, was absolutely wonderful and ridiculously overdue!!!
My mom and I cleaned and worked hard, and walked... A LOT. But it was good, and we were able to make a significant dent in my brother's room and bathroom, PTL! We were able to exercise together, and I'm confident that it was the first time my Mom and I have ever been to a gym together. Lord-willing, this will be the first of many!
My mom and I talked about my relationships, the Guy I'm interested in right now (Yes, I have someone!), weight, love, life, structure, God... you name it, we talked about it. I don't even have the words to express how great it was to be with my Mom this weekend. She spoke some truths into my life that I desperately needed to hear too. And I cried hearing them, because they are hard to swallow, but good for growth! I'm sad that because of my obligations (you name it, I'm sure I'm over-involved!) I won't get to see her until April!!! :( Unless I can coax her into driving up to have lunch with me one day.
Come to think of it... I think I will do that!
My roommate and I REALLY got a chance to talk last night. I don't think people know how great Jenn is (I live with a Jenn... FYI). She has been such a blessing in my life! I'd never lived with a roommate for more than four months, and in May, I'll have lived with her for 3 years!!!! Who said I didn't take a big girl pill? You Punk! It's so funny (in hindsight) to see how God moved so divinely in my life and in hers, and how much I needed her in my life to grow up. Jenn is, for all intensive purposes, completely different from me, although many people think we're similar. She is (all at once) both my sandpaper friend -- rubbing me against the grain to grow, and well as one of my greatest encouragers -- pushing me forward -- and completely different -- challenging me to grow and stretch in ways I never thought of. We laughed last night about where we exercise control and where we don't, and how it couldn't have worked out more perfectly if we'd tried! Anywhoo... I'm glad we were able to talk.
If you think about it, please please please continue to pray for her. I know, and I mean I KNOW, that God still heals. While I have no idea of what His purpose was, I know that His Grace is Sufficient for the storm of life.
I have a busy week ahead, but I'm glad I had this weekend to mentally regroup. The next 8 weeks are going to be challenging and push me harder than I've been pushed in a while.
But I can do this... i CAN do this... i can DO this... i can do THIS.