DWTS Recap

I know some of you are yawning that I would do a recap, but I mentioned a few weeks ago that I'm changing. I LOVE Dancing with the Stars!!!

Here we go!

Li'l Kim & Derek Hough -- I feel like Derek got Punk'd. Li'l Kim... REALLY? Her dancing wasn't horrible, but her shout out to her girls at the Federal Detention Center... PRICELESS. And did she have some work done to her face? She looked different. Quasi-unrelated -- I won't let my friend Aubre work on my eyebrows because I'm afraid I would look like Li'l Kim.

Belinda Carlisle & Jonathan Roberts -- I love some B.C. I have the moves to her "Heaven is a Place on Earth" video memorized. Cue mood lighting and excessive red lipstick. Oh, and somebody get me a globe, thanks. I thought Belinda did well... reminscent of Priscilla Presley, but good nonetheless.

Lawrence Taylor & Edyta Sliwinska -- Don't really know Lawrence, but he tried and definitely deserves points for trying. I'm afraid that Edyta is going to have to go naked before the end of the season to help him out though.

Steve-O & Lacey Schwimmer -- I actually thought that Steve-O did a good job!!! I would love to mention here that, with my love for bad boys, it was awesome to see Johnny Knoxville in the audience. I mean... YUM. Steve-O's got a lot of work (as does Lacey), but I think they'll be good. She's sweet, and Lord knows that boy needs sweet in his life.

Gilles Marini & Cheryl Burke -- I love Cheryl, and am uncomfortable watching Gilles since I've seen the S&TC movie. (I know... I wish I could burn that out of my brain too.) Their dance was good, but I was sitting by a boy and felt well, uncomfortable. Gilles was pretty good overall.

Chuck Wicks & Julianne Hough -- In light of celebrity relationships, I don't think doing this show was a good idea. Chuck was okay, but Julianne is all googly and frankly, I didn't enjoy it.

Holly Madison & Dmitry Chaplin -- Holly is a few months younger than I am. As much as I love Dmitry (and he is seriously AWESOME), I feel sorry for him. She's only staying on because people have seen her naked. She was clumpy on the floor.

Ty Murray & Chelsea Hightower -- watching the rehearsal videos was hilarious. Poor Ty was more anxious of being made fun of than dancing. He was charming, in a I-normally-wrangle-and-rope-things-in-for-a-living sort of way. If Chelsea can work in a rope, I think Ty would come out of his shell more.

Shawn Johnson & Mark Ballas -- Shawn is Tiny and Smiley and very professional. She really did a good job! Mark is as sweet as ever, and I hope that he and Shawn do really well.

Steve Wozniak & Karina Smirnoff -- Karina was virtually naked to woo the judges in and away from Steve's dancing. And in Steve's defense, He Did Try. He's corny and pretty uncoordinated, but he tried. And if all else fails, he has more money than we do, and he'll find a way to turn this all into an iPhone/iTouch application. "Dancing With Your Phone"... $2.99.

David Alan Grier & Kym Johnson -- I was prepared for overthetop D.A.G. schtick, but he actually did a good job.

Denise Richards & Maksim Chmerkovskiy -- Who nominated her for this show??? You're fired. She cried in rehearsals. :( Denise, this is not YOUR reality show. Keep those tears on E! and act like a 39 year old woman with kids on television. Sheesh. I didn't enjoy it, and the group that I watched with -- we're all collectively sure that Karina wants to poke Denise's eyes out. Denise -- He's taken. Remember that Sweetie.

Melissa Rycroft & Tony Dovalani -- her presence on this show only reiterates that Jason we'vealreadyforgottenyourname is an idiot. 48 hours of rehearsal, and she really was the best. I hope Melissa wins. Tony deserves it For Sure!

Gotta recap? Thoughts? Comments?